Tony McNally: Thursdays Fire Mission (Bravo one)

Thursday, 24 September 2009

Thursdays Fire Mission (Bravo one)

Wards overrun with war casualties This proves we need dedicated military hospitals.

RAF Chinooks To Undergo £400m Overhaul RAF Chinooks To Undergo £400m Overhaul This is good news on the face of it , but I believe that this upgrade will take up to five years, which when our troops are dying on a near daily basis is too long.

Defence Minister Meets Royal Navy Recruits I wonder how many of these sailors will want to be submariners?

750 dissident bomb alerts in past two years Yet they tell us there is peace in Northern Ireland, `dissidents` sounds like something Peter Mandelson would be proud of!

Wounded soldier Fusilier Thomas James pays tribute to fallen comrade Fusilier Shaun Bush shows the courage that made him a soldier, thank you for your service.

A Canadian lady wrote a number of letters to the Canadian government complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities. She received the following reply:

National Defence Headquarters
Major Gen George R. Pearkes Bldg,
15 NT 101 Colonel By Drive
Ottawa ON
K1 A 0K2
Canada

Dear Concerned Citizen,

Thank you for your recent letter. Your expression of profound concern for the treatment of recent Taliban and Al Qaeda fighters captured by Canadian Forces is of great interest to us. The prisoners that you speak of were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in the Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.
Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa . You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself; we are creating a new department here at National Defence, to be called the 'Canadian Responsibilities Accepted Program', or C.R.A.P. for short.
In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided to divert one convicted terrorist and assign him to your personal care to begin the program. Your detainee has already been selected and is scheduled for transportation under armed guard to your residence in Toronto next Monday and is to arrive at 13:00 hrs. your time. Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud (you can just call him Ahmed) is to be cared for pursuant to the standards that you personally demanded in your letter of complaint. It will likely be necessary and is strongly advised that you to hire some assistant caretakers. We will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of care for Ahmed are commensurate with those you so pointedly recommended in your letter and to evaluate how well the program is going.

Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his 'attitudinal problem' will help him overcome these character flaws. Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences. We understand that you have suggested counselling and home schooling and so we expect this to be a part of the daily routine for Ahmed at your home.

Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers. We advise that you do not question him about these skills at your next in home group therapy meeting. He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless (in your opinion) this might offend him.

Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or your daughters (except sexually) since he views females as a subhuman form of property. This is a particularly sensitive subject for him and he has been known to show violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the new dress code that he will demand that you wear as more appropriate attire. I'm sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka over time. Just remember that it is all part of 'respecting his culture and religious beliefs', as described in your letter.

Thanks again for your concern. We truly appreciate it when you folks keep us informed of the proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man. You take good care of Ahmed, and remember, we'll be watching.
Good luck and thanks for taking part.

Cordially,
Minister of National Defence

HT, Bryan.

"We need four boats to keep nuclear deterrent" If we could have managed with three boats in the first place then that’s what we would have had. The Red Robot is just trying to suck arse Obama when Obama wants nothing to do with him! To all the Labour voters in my home town of Barrow, carry on voting Labour all the way to the job centre!

Final farewell to teenage soldier A QUIET South Yorkshire village came to a standstill today as hundreds packed its streets to pay their respects to a 19-year-old soldier who was shot dead in southern Afghanistan. RIP

Hollywood star joins North Yorkshire troops in Afghanistan Ray Winstone IS A Hollywood star? Well thanks for supporting the boys anyway.

Back to action for Iraq veteran
Private Luke Hanna, of 2nd Battalion The Royal Welsh is an extremely brave man, I wish you well and thank you for your service.